it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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