Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
