Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
its liver damage thursday
Randomize