This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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