they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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