mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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