I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
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