Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize