What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Randomize
