The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
