we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
well I can't set my house on fire every night
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
