Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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