I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
