chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
