idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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