Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
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