There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
