it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
