Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
