I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
