Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
