Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
