I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
