Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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