I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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