you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
