On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
