before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
