her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize