ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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