I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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