office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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