yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
