wakey wakey hands off snakey
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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