there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Randomize
