You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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