Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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