Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
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