**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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