I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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