I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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