i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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