he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
