Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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