Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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