Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize
