hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
