So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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