do herpes really smell.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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