whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Randomize
