why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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